Friday, June 13, 2014

PHILOSOPHICALLY THINKING ABOUT FATHER"S DAY

 Philosophically thinking about Father’s Day  on  June 15, 2014

 (Compilation for a discourse by N.R. Srinivasan, Nashville TN, June 2014)

I am sure you would have read my discourses “Father’s Day Worship in American Churches and Hindu Temples” and “Hindu American Way of Father’s Day Celebration” delivered earlier.   Father’s day, a socially inspired celebration and veneration sprung out of love for a father has been converted to a day of religious worship in Western Culture. American Hindus do not lag behind and so have made it a day of Special religious Events Day of worship in Hindu Temples in America. They have more reasons than others as Hindus always worship Mother, Father and Guru as Gods and in that order as per Vedic commands in Taittareeya Upanishad—(Matru devo bhava; Pitru devo bhava; Aachaaryya devo bhava). But Hindus have not ear marked any one day or any one god for celebration of these mortal gods but worship father all the time even if he is not good to them.  But they do have special fortnight for honoring Pitrus (deceased ancestors) called Pitrupaksha. They also worship them before starting any major sacrament like Upanayana (thread ceremony) or Vivaaha (Marriage) called Naandi Shraaddha.

There is a dad behind every child they say.  I do not have the experience of many for I did neither grow up with my father nor did I grow up with my siblings.  Driven by a divine decision at the age of eight I decided to move away from my parents from a village in erstwhile State of   Mysore and lived with my grand-father in Chennai.  I did not have the joy of living with my siblings to share love with them and enjoy the fun of customary fights too. I know only that my blood pleasure, heart surgery, quick temper and occasional frustration in life is from my father and the genes he affectionately passed on.   My father too did not grow up under the umbrella of his father as his father passed away while he was two years of age. So, both of us missed the concept of Pitru devo Bhava. (Look upon your father as God) so dear to Hindu way of Life.  But I do not fail to think of him on this memorable day but for whom I would not have been here to serve you.   

I often wonder why graduation ceremony is so important in Hindu American Way of life!   It is a day to part with your son or daughter and say “You are on your own kid; don’t feel shy to call me when you need me”.  Probably kid celebrates Father’s Day that comes next after graduation to thank his father for his or her getting independence from Father-raj!  I succeeded to be a successful father not learning the trick of the trade from my father. My children looked upon me something akin to worship when they were young and growing up in India probably tutored or disciplined by elders at home.  I too could discipline my children while in India.  Then I moved to USA.  They graduated not only from High School but also from reputed colleges too here.  I went beyond customary American Norms to bring up children despite my struggles being uprooted from India.  I could influence their choice too as to what to study for their own benefit and to have a prestigious status in Hindu migrant society. Later I felt they started despising my advice, my words and limitations I placed upon them blending with American culture.  Probably they felt my IQ started   shrinking down to nothing as their own rose to near Einstein Levels. When they questioned my judgment I felt I am getting dumber. My son diplomatically ignores my advice telling his mom “there is a generation gap mom; dad does not understand”.  The trouble is not with them it is with me as a father.  Hopefully if my mental capacities improve may be they will find me worth listening to again!  But do I have the luxury of time and effort?  Here is a society where children no longer listen to their dads after a while.  They want to be self-made. Of course even in India I too was so by exception. Rather we have to accommodate and adjust to children’s views as they grow older.  

 As fathers we should be aware to the changes in ourselves and consider our children as our friends and well-wishers rather than dependents. A Subhashita (good saying) also says as you grow old treat them as your equal and friends.  So the formula “Pitru devo Bhava” won’t work in America, of late in India too. Nevertheless we cannot dismiss the fact that fathers are the key to changing the family to be healthy and changing the country to be peaceful. We hear of Father of the Nation and Pilgrim Fathers but not hear about Mother of the Nation or Pilgrim Mothers. I wonder whether Pilgrim Fathers had wives and also brought their wives with them.   Many of us do not know how to be an effective father because we did not have had an effective father when we were growing up. It is not that love alone is enough. No dad ever loved his kids as Dhritaraashtra did. Dhrita-raashtra means one who is firmly attached to his kingdom.  But he failed miserably as a father. He was attached to his Kingdom as his name Dhrita+Raashtra suggests and failed to bring up children morally and spiritually. He did not turn out spiritually Dhrita-putra though he was firmly attached to them and wanted  to continue Kuru dynasty.

My religious thoughts do not take me to pay that high respect to my father or ancestors as my spiritual thoughts compel.  We are all familiar with the customary hymns (slokas) recited with reverence on Father’s Day:
Maataa Raamo mat-Pitaa Raamacandrah | Svaamee  Raamo Mat-Sakha Raamacandrah  
Sarvasvam Me Raamacandro Dayaalu |Na -Anyam Jaane Naiva Jaane Na Jaane  
    
[Rama is my  Mother  and  Rama (Ramachandra) is my Father, Rama is my Lord   and  Rama (Ramachandra) is  my  Friend, Rama  is  my  All  in  All, O the Compassionate Rama (Ramachandra)!  I do not know any other; I do not know any other; indeed I do not know any other.] 

Rama had no experience as a father and had abandoned his wife when she was pregnant.   His children grew up under the care of Valmiki. How could he be an ideal father?  Probably he did not have an effective father though his father was very affectionate. Rama abandoned kingship   neglected his subjects to fulfill the promise of Dasaratha (influenced by his amorous life) made to Kaikeyi, his cunning step mother. It was then Tretaayuga and not Dwaaparayuga. If Krishna or Bhagavadgeetaa were there his duty as a king would have become more important. Laws do change over a time too. So do our scriptures. 

During Father’s day celebration we all recite: “Jagatah pitarau vande Paarvatee parameshvarau” [Our obeisance to world parents Paarvati and Parameswara]. Here we seek the blessings of Parvathi-Parameswara as universal parents.    Here again Siva was never an ideal father.  He was a recluse most of the times as Puranas depict. Parvati throughout her life was trying to domesticate him. Both Ganesha and Kumara are Ayonijas and are not womb born of Parvati.
Religious approach seems to be not that good based on the above and learning further also the story of Parasurama who beheaded his mother implicitly obeying his father whatever may be the justification (that was his law of the letter Pitru devo bhava!). Probably Narasimha episode did not happen on planet earth, who knows. Buddha walked away from worldly responsibilities confused and disturbed.

Probably worshiping Krishna would be better. He is occasionally mentioned as Vasudeva-suta Son of Vasudeva and Nanda-kumara fostered son of Nanda.  But he is more popularly known as Radhakrishna, Union of Jeevaatma and Paramaatma and also as Jagnnaatha (Universal Lord) or Janaardhana (Savior of people). I never heard of Pradyumna as Krishna-suta.

Bhagavadgeeta refers to Supreme Being or Brahman as the Universal Father. Why then we should be in search of other Gods? Please think of the following verse  in Bhagavadgeetaa:
Pitaamahasya jagato  maataa dhaataa pitaamahah  |
Vedyam pavitram onkaara riksaamayajur-eva cha || 9-17 ||

I am the Father of this world, the Mother, the Dispenser, the Grandsire, that which is to be known, the purifier, the Om and also the Vedas-Rigveda, Saamaveda and Yajurveda (probably Atharvaveda did not exist then or probably Vedavyasa was still working on it at that time!]

Upanishads dictate us the command: “Pitru devo Bhava”—treat your father as God (while living). They also mention of Pitruloka which is equated with   Chandraloka. When one who   performing sakaama Karmas (desire motivated actions by Bhaktimarga) or lower kind of Upaasanas dies he gets only the greatness of the pitrus or manes and attains similarity with the Moon. One attains the moon through Pitruyana and returns to this world by the same way.  Bhagavadgeeta also echoes 

Upanishads and  Gita say those who worship Pitrus attain   ancestors in pitruloka:

Yaanti devavrataa devaan pitrun yaanti pitruvrataah |
Bhootaani yaanti bhootejyaa yaanti madyaajino api maam || 9-25 ||

The worshipers of the gods go to the gods, the worshipers of the manes go to the manes, the worshipers of the spirits go to the spirits, and my worshipers (those who meditate on Brahman) too come to me.

Upanishads thus give us a hope to check back if we are good fathers when we meet our kids in Pitruloka and also check back their loyalty. Kids who prefer pitruloka worship parents. Brahmaaloka is for the rare few. Useless kids suffer being born as lower creatures.   Thus there are three Choices—1. Enter Pitruloka, enjoy for a while and return back to earth to  further elevate: 2) Enter Chandraloka stay  for a while in Chandraloka enjoying time  and then proceed to Brahmaloka for permanent settlement; 3) Not being  eligible for either wander around aimlessly being born as lower creatures.

Our Scriptures insist on Nandi Shraddha honoring Pitrus before any Samskaara (sacrament). The ritual of Shraddha performed during the start of any joyous ceremony and performance of any of the 16 religious rites, and recitation of specific mantras for success of the ceremony is called Nandi Shraddha. In this ritual Satyavasu (or kratudaksha) or the vishve deities and the father-grandfather-great grandfather, mother-grandmother (mother’s mother) - great grandmother (mother’s grandmother) and mother- grandmother (mother’s mother-in-law)-great grandmother (mother-in-law of mother’s mother-in-law) are invoked. So if some of us cannot enjoy father’s company here they can still do so by good acts   to join forefathers who have led a noble life and enjoy life for a while in Pitruloka. Hence why not regard them as Gods or guardian angels in this life itself when they are good to us and who always sacrifice every comfort of theirs for us?  There is a compelling reason why we should think of fathers who are not good to us or even cruel to us as could be learnt from the life of legendary or mythological Prahalada, a devotee of Vishnu.

As we have learnt in Puranas, Lord Vishnu came to the rescue of pious and noble Prahlada emerging out of the pillar during the twilight zone as Narasimha in his incarnation of half lion and half man and killed his father Hiranyakasipu. Prahlada was deeply grieved and felt still indebted to his father though he would have been  killed by him but for the intervention of the lord and yet requested Narasimha to pardon his father's sins and grant him Moksha or liberation to him, indeed a noble gesture unthinkable. Even Narasimha should have been surprised! How can Lord refuse his beloved devotees request? He blessed Prahlada to be a Chiranjeevi, (Immortal) and a permanent companion of his.  Prahlada was first ever to honor his father and bring him Eternal Bliss in spite of all the cruelty meted out to him. Bhagawan says in Bhagavadgeetaa that among deityas (demons) he is Prahlada (deityaanam prhlaadosmi), thus complimenting the noble and PHILOSOPHICALLY THINKING pious King Prahlaada.  Here is a scenario of most pious and noble son and the most cruel father who would have any how killed him for his being adamant as to not to accept that his father was Superior to Narayana. There is a good lot of philosophical thinking behind it.
At the moment conception takes place, an immortal soul enters the universe for the first time. This unique human being is graced by the divine power and is a gift from the Creator. God places this beautiful gift into the womb of the mother through the medium of father. Their first desire to beget a child is considered as sacred act of charity by the father because such a conception gives an opportunity for a wandering soul eagerly waiting for an abode to re-enter the world to exhaust its past Karmas. This charity initiated by the husband is called Garbhaadaan.  The human being born of that conception gets an entry to the world to work his or her way to elevate, if not accumulate fresh Karmas. Choice and consequences are that of the individual.  It is as an act of charity of father in life like Kanyadanam in Hindu concept. However bad a father may be this first act of charity by the father makes the son indebted to him. But for his father Prahlada would neither have been in this world nor there been any reason for the Avatar of Narasimha. So it was all the divine will and plan.

We read in newspapers of many killings father by a child and a child by father in these days and in history and Puranas too.  There are many children in USA raised by single mothers. While it makes lot of sense to some to celebrate Father’s Day it also serves no purpose to many others if the father has walked away from his responsibility.  It is strange we often meet a bad and cruel father who has a wise and noble kid and vice versa. There are too many examples today of ungrateful adult children and grandchildren who fail to honor their fathers. These off-springs if they are not happy with the contributions of their fathers should at least recognize that they owe their very existence in this world due to him. We can learn from the past and try to become good fathers. If you carefully watch a good father he is also a good husband who treats all women with respect and also teaches his kids to do the same. Who can know the working of God; we can only watch, speculate and hope? We have one life to live and one dad to reckon with in this life who is responsible for our birth in this world. Let us philosophically think and obey the Vedic command and elevate father to status of Vyaahriti of Brahman (God) and meditate on Brahman who is the Universal father (pitaamahasya jagato) with the Mantra Pitru devo Bhava. Those who have no kids and go to the temple on this day to participate in the religious celebration can pray for worthy kids like Prahlaada to honor their parents and serve the society, whatever be their experience.

Therefore it makes lot of sense to join the mainstream to honor father on Father’s Day however bad or indifferent a father may be. If you have a father or guardian in life--a father figure who has blessed you, take a moment to thank and love them. And if you have the opportunity to bless a child by being a stable loving influence in their lives, take pride in it. Not only will you be blessed, your influence may very well change the lives of others for many generations to come. Solomon, the Wise once said: “an eye that disdains a father and dispenses a mother—that eye will be plucked out by wild vultures and consumed by young eagles” stressing forcefully the duty of a child to honor his parents.  So say Happy Father’s Day and celebrate or dedicate the day for worship with the wisdom of Vedas focused on “Pitru Devo Bhava”.
                          


APPENDIX

 

MANTRAS & SLOKAS ON FATHER FROM VARIOUS SCRIPTURES

 

Mantra from Taittareeya Upanishad

“Pitru devo bhava”--May the Father be, to thee, God!

Deva-pitru-kaaryaabhyaam na pramaditavyam

Never swerve from your duties towards gods and to the Pitrus! (departed souls that includes father if he is not alive)

Atharva Veda

The son shall be devoted to his father, be of the same mind with his mother.

 

1. Sloka from Puranas-

 

पिता à¤§à¤°्मः à¤ªिता à¤¸्वर्गः à¤ªिता à¤¹ि à¤ªà¤°à¤®ं à¤¤à¤ªः। à¤ªितरि à¤ª्रीतिमापन्ने à¤ª्रीयन्ते à¤¸à¤°्वदेवताः॥

Pita swarga,Pita dharm ,Pita hi Param Tapo ; Pitari pritimaapannay, Preeyantay sarva devatah

 

Father is compared to Heaven; Father is Religion; Father is ultimate sacrifice. He is placed at a higher pedestal than all Gods combined --Padma Purana & Mahabharata

 

2.  Slokas from Chankya Neeti

 

जनिता à¤šोपनेता à¤š à¤¯à¤¸्तु à¤µिद्यां à¤ª्रयच्छति |अन्नदाता à¤­à¤¯à¤¤्राता à¤ªà¤ž्चैते à¤ªितरः à¤¸्मृताः |

Janitaa chopanetaa cha yastu vidyaam prayachchati | annadaataa bhayatraataa pa~nchaite pitarahsmrutaah ||

One who gives birth, one who brings closer (to the Lord, to spirituality - by means of initiating through the sacred thread ceremony), he who gives knowledge, he who gives food, and he who protects from fear - these 5 are deemed as fathers.

 

 à¤¸à¤¤्यं à¤®ाता à¤ªिता à¤œ्ञानं à¤§à¤°्मो à¤­्राता à¤¦à¤¯ा à¤¸à¤–ा। à¤¶ान्तिपत्नी à¤•्षमा à¤ªुत्रषडेते à¤®à¤® à¤¬ान्धवा:

Satyam mata pitaa jnaanam  dharmo bhraata dayaa Sakha | shantih patnee kshama putrah shadete mama baandhavaah ||

Truth is my mother, Knowledge is my father, Righteousness is my brother, Mercy is my friend, and Peace is my wife and Forgiveness my son. These six are my kith and kins.

 

 à¤¸à¤°्वतीर्थमयी à¤®ाता à¤¸à¤°्वदेवमयः à¤ªिता | à¤®ातरं à¤ªितरं à¤¤à¤¸्मात् à¤¸à¤°्वयत्नेन à¤ªूजयेत् ||

sarvateerthamayee maataa sarvadevamayah pitaa |  maataram pitaram  tasmaat sarvayatnena poojayet ||

 

 Mother is (the embodiment) of all pilgrimages, father is (the embodiment) of all deities. Hence, mother and father are to be revered with all efforts.

 

 

3. Slokas from Ramayana

 

यन्मातापितरौ à¤µृत्तं à¤¤à¤¨à¤¯े à¤•ुरुतः à¤¸à¤¦ा | à¤¨ à¤¸ुप्रतिकारं à¤¤à¤¤्तु à¤®ात्रा à¤ªित्रा à¤š à¤¯à¤¤्कृतम् |
 

yanmaataapitarau vruttam tanaye kurutah sadaa  | na supratikaaram tattu maatraa pitraa cha yatkrutam ||

--Valmiki Ramayana, Ayodhya Kanda

The deeds done by mother and father for their children constantly; there is no requital to these actions performed by the parents.

 

 à¤¯à¤¤ः à¤®ूलम् à¤¨à¤°ः à¤ªà¤¶्येत् à¤ª्रादुर्भावम् à¤‡à¤¹ à¤†à¤¤्मनः | à¤•à¤¥à¤®् à¤¤à¤¸्मिन् à¤¨ à¤µà¤°्तेत à¤ª्रत्यक्षे à¤¸à¤¤ि à¤¦ैवते || à¥¨-१८-१६

Yatah moolam narah pasyet pradurbhaavam iha aatmanah; katham tasmin na varteta prtyaksham sati devatae-218-16


A man can see his father as the cause of his existence, (so) why wouldn't he want to behave (towards his father) as if his father were visible God (pratyaksha devata)

 

 

4. Slokas from Garuda Purana  

 

पितॄन्नमस्ये à¤¨िवसन्ति à¤¸ाक्षाद्ये à¤¦ेवलोकेऽथ à¤®à¤¹ीतले à¤µा 
तथान्तरिक्षे à¤š à¤¸ुरारिपूज्यास्ते à¤µै à¤ª्रतीच्छन्तु à¤®à¤¯ोपनीतम्  89.27 
Pitru-nnamasye nivasanti sakshaadye devaloke atha maheetale vaa; tatha-antarikshe cha suraaripoojyaaste vai prateecchntu mayopaneetam

 

पितॄन्नमस्ये à¤ªà¤°à¤®ार्थभूता à¤¯े à¤µै à¤µिमाने à¤¨िवसन्त्यमूर्त्ताः 
यजन्ति à¤¯ानस्तमलैर्मनोभिर्योगीश्वराः à¤•्लेशविमुक्तिहेतून्  89.28 
Pitirun-namasye paramaarthabhootaa ye vai vimaane nivasantyamoortaah;

yajanti yaanast-amalair-manobhir-yogeesvaraah klesa-vimukta-hetoon

पितॄन्नमस्ये à¤¦िवि à¤¯े à¤š à¤®ूर्त्ताः à¤¸्वधाभुजः à¤•ाम्यफलाभिसन्धौ 
प्रदानशक्ताः à¤¸à¤•à¤²ेप्सितानां à¤µिमुक्तिदा à¤¯ेऽनभिसंहितेषु  89.29 

Pitrun-namsye divi ye cha moorttaah svadhaabhujaah kaamya-phalaabhi-sandhau; pradaana-saktaah sakalepsitaanaam vimuktidaa ye-anabhi-samhiteshu

 

I bow before my father, in whom all the deities of all realms reside, truly he is my deity.

 

I bow before my father who resides in the formless guise of Paramartha, who is worshipped by blameless yogis for liberation from all conflict (of samsara).
I bow before my father, in whom I see all gods and who fulfills all my aspirations. He is the inspiration for achievements, and he relieves me from all worries. I pay my obeisance to my revered father.

पिता à¤¯à¤š्छति à¤ªुत्राय à¤¬ाल्ये à¤µिद्याधनं à¤®à¤¹à¤¤्। à¤ªिताsस्य à¤•िं à¤¤à¤ªà¤¸्तेपे à¤‡à¤¤्युक्तिस्तत्कृतज्ञता।। 

Pitaa yacchati putraaya baalye vidyaadhanam mahat; pitaa asya ki tapas-tepe ityuktis-tat-kritajnyata ||

 

Father gives abundant wealth of education to his son in his childhood. He is the object of meditation, reverence and gratitude.

 

5.  Slokas from Mahabharata

 

Maataa gurutaram bhoomehe khaat pitottarastatha | Manah sheegrataram vayoho chinta bahutaree trunaath.

 

This is Yudhistira's answer to Yaksha's question. In Mahabharata.   Yaksha asks Yudhistira to name that which is greater than earth, loftier than sky, speedier than wind, and abundant than grass. Yudhistira says, mother is greater than earth, father is loftier than sky, mind is speedier than wind and worries are more abundant than grass!

 

पिता à¤¸्वर्गः à¤ªिता à¤§à¤°्मः à¤ªिता à¤ªà¤°à¤®à¤•ं à¤¤à¤ªः | पितरि à¤ª्रीतिमापन्ने à¤¸à¤°्वाः à¤ª्रीयन्ति à¤¦ेवताः ||  

Pitaa svargah pitaa dharmah pitaa parama(ga)m tapah; pitari preeyam-aapanne sarvaah preeyanti devataah

My father is my heaven, my father is my dharma, and he is the ultimate penance of my life. If he is happy, all deities are pleased-- Mahabharata, Santiparva, chapter 258,sloka 20.

 

[This is  I also quoted in à¤¸्कन्दपुराणम्/माहेश्वरखण्डः/कौमारिकाखण्डः/अध्यायः à¥¬, and the Southern recension of the Mahabharata, with slight modifications],

 

yena baalo na paatithaha. | Na shobhate sabhaa madhye hamsa madye bako yathaa. ||

 

Parents who do not educate their children are enemies to them.  They do not shine amidst scholars like a crane amidst swans.

 

Laalayedbaalakam taavath yatra vimugdhataa | Raajaa prajaswiva preetim paschaath prachcha-dayeth pitaa. ||

 

The father should cuddle his children till they are innocent. Afterwards, he should hide his love his love like a king hides his love for his subjects.

Vinayantu sutaan santaha svasampaadyaaha punargunaaha | Sarvam krushaanaaha kurvantu beejam sootenkuram svataha ||

It is the duty of father [virtuous people] to educate their children. The children themselves should gather virtues.  The farmers do every other work; but the seed sprouts on its own.

अन्नदाता à¤­à¤¯à¤¤्राता à¤µिद्यादाता à¤¤à¤¥ैव à¤š  à¤œà¤¨िता à¤šोपनेता à¤š à¤ªà¤ž्चैते à¤ªितरः à¤¸्मृताः॥

Annadaataa bhayatraataa vidyaadaataa tathauva cha | janitaa chopanetaa cha panchaite pitaraha smritaah ||

 

Who could be considered a father?   One who feeds you i.e. provides ; One who keeps you away from fear; One who educates; one who caused the birth(biological) ; One who performs the sacred thread ceremony. These five qualify to be called "father". This shloka states in one go the duties of a father. It tells to treat each one that fits these descriptions as a father, if only they are different.

 

6. Sloka from Srimad Bhagavatam  

 

गुरुर्न à¤¸ à¤¸्यात्स्वजनो à¤¨ à¤¸ à¤¸्यात्त्पिता à¤¨ à¤¸ à¤¸्याज्जननी à¤¨ à¤¸ा à¤¸्यात्  à¤¦ैवं à¤¨ à¤¤à¤¤्स्यान्न à¤ªà¤¤िश्च à¤¸ à¤¸्यान्न à¤®ोचयेद्यः à¤¸à¤®ुपेतमृत्युम् ॥१८॥

 One who cannot deliver his dependents from the path of repeated birth and death should never become a spiritual master, a father, a husband, a mother or a worship-worthy demigod.

There are many spiritual masters, but Rishabhadeva advises that one should not become a spiritual master if he is unable to save his disciple from the path of birth and death.  He also advises a father should be also a spiritual teacher along with others

 

7. Sloka from Raghuvamsa 

Vagarthaviva sampriktau vagarthah pratipattaye | Jagatah pitarau vande parvathee parameshwarau || – Raghuvamsha 1.1

 

I pray parents of the world, Lord Shiva and Mother Parvati, who are inseparable as speech and its meaning to gain knowledge of speech and its meaning.

8. SLOKA FROM MARKANDEYA SMRITI

 

Maataapitruparaa ye cha gurubhaktaah priyamvadaah| 

satyaarjavarataa ye cha  tay naraah svargagaaminah || 



Dedicated to father mother and guru, as well as practicing   kindness and focus on Truth one progresses towards Svargaloka--117:18) 

 

9. SLOKAS FROM  MANU SMRITI

In the second chapter from slokas 225-235 Manusmriti deals with the honest service to be rendered to the elders particularly to father, mother and Guru. It is essential for all to devote all their attention to these three sacred figures glorified by Veda Mantras in Taittareeya Upanishad—Matru devo bhava; Pitru  devo  bhava;  Acharya devo bhava. If they follow this religion they need not follow any other, because the father is like the God, the mother is like the   Earth and the brothers are like the replica of the Self. The debts of the immediate creators—father and mother cannot be repaid even after hundred years of selfless service. These three (parents and guru) are like three Asram (phases of life), triloka (three worlds), triveda (three Vedas), and three Agnis (father—gaarhapatyaagni or domestic fire, mother-dakshinaagni or southern fire, and the Guru-Aahvaneeyaagni or the fire of rituals). A person wins this world with his devotion to the mother, he wins Space with his devotion to father and the Brahmaloka with his devotion to his Guru:

 

Aachaaryasacha pitaa chaiva maataa bhraataa cha poorvajaa |

Naartenaapyavamantavyaa braahmanena viseshatah || 225 ||

 

Aachaaryo brahnmano moortih pitaa moortih prajaapateh |

Maataa prithivyaa moortistu bhraataa svo moortiraatmanah || 226 ||

 

Teshaam trayaanaam susrooshaaparamam tapah uchyate|

Na tairabhya-anujnaatoe dharmamayam samaacharet || 229 ||

 

 

225. The teacher, the father, the mother, and an elder brother must not be treated with disrespect, especially by a Brahmana, though one be grievously offended (by them).

 

226. The teacher is the image of Brahman, the father the image of Prajaapati (the lord of created beings), the mother the image of the earth, and an (elder) full brother the image of oneself.

 

227. That trouble (and pain) which the parents undergo on the birth of (their) children, cannot be compensated even in a hundred years.

228. Let him always do what is agreeable to those (two) and always (what may please) his teacher; when those three are pleased, he obtains all (those rewards which) austerities (yield).

 

229. Obedience towards those three is declared to be the best (form of) austerity; let him not perform other meritorious acts without their permission.

230. For they are declared to be the three worlds, they the three (principal) orders, they the three Vedas, and they the three sacred fires.

231. The father, forsooth, is stated to be the Garhapatya fire, the mother the Dakshinagni, but the teacher the Ahavaniya fire; this triad of fires is most venerable.

232. He who neglects not those three, (even after he has become) a householder, will conquer the three worlds and, radiant in body like a god, he will enjoy bliss in heaven.

233. By honoring his mother he gains this (nether) world, by honoring his father the middle sphere, but by obedience to his teacher the world of Brahman.

234. All duties have been fulfilled by him who honors those three; but to him who honors them not, all rites remain fruitless.

235. As long as those three live, so long let him not (independently) perform any other (meritorious acts); let him always serve them, rejoicing (to do what is) agreeable and beneficial (to them).

 

4-162. Let him never offend the teacher who initiated him, nor him who explained the Veda, nor his father and mother, nor (any other) Guru, nor cows, nor Brahmanas, nor any men performing austerities.

 

 

  


11 Quotes from Barack Obama That All Dads Should Hear
“Every father bears a fundamental obligation to do right by their children,” the former president said.


Barack Obama’s fatherhood goals.
He wrote about his relationship with his own father, Barack Obama Sr., in his book “Dreams From My Father.” Early in his presidency, Obama hosted a town hall meeting on the trials of fatherhood during his Young Men’s Barbeque in 2009. He always seemed happiest when he was kicking it with the kids at the White House Easter Egg Roll or visiting schools around the world.

Many dads could learn a thing or two about leading a family from the former leader of the country. This Father’s Day, we look back at times when the former president offered some tough, yet loving, advice to fathers on what it takes to raise smart, powerful, compassionate children who may make the world a better place.

On Being A Man
“What makes you a man is not the ability to have a child — it’s the courage to raise one.” ― Father’s Day speech, Apostolic Church of God in Chicago, 2008

On Being A Father
“As fathers, we need to be involved in our children’s lives not just when it’s convenient or easy, and not just when they’re doing well — but when it’s difficult and thankless, and they’re struggling. That is when they need us most.” ― Op-ed in Parade magazine, 2009

On Teaching Empathy
“We need to show our kids that you’re not strong by putting other people down — you’re strong by lifting them up. That’s our responsibility as fathers.”Father’s Day speech, Apostolic Church of God in Chicago, 2008

On Raising Daughters
“It’s up to us to say to our daughters, don’t ever let images on TV tell you what you are worth, because I expect you to dream without limit and reach for those goals.” ― Father’s Day speech, Apostolic Church of God in Chicago, 2008

On Raising Sons
“It’s up to us to tell our sons, those songs on the radio may glorify violence, but in my house we give glory to achievement, self-respect and hard work. It’s up to us to set these high expectations. And that means meeting those expectations ourselves. That means setting examples of excellence in our own lives.” ― Father’s Day speech, Apostolic Church of God in Chicago, 2008

On Education
“Michelle and I know that our first job, our first responsibility, is instilling a sense of learning, a sense of a love of learning in our kids. And so there are no shortcuts there; we have to do that job. And we can’t just blame teachers and schools if we’re not instilling that commitment, that dedication to learning, in our kids.” ― Remarks on No Child Left Behind flexibility, 2011

On Making Mistakes
“I’m still practicing, I’m still learning, still getting corrected in terms of how to be a fine husband and a good father. But I will tell you this: Everything else is unfulfilled if we fail at family, if we fail at that responsibility.” ― Morehouse College Commencement speech, 2013

On A Father’s Strength
“Whether biological, foster, or adoptive, they teach us through the encouragement they give, the questions they answer, the limits they set, and the strength they show in the face of difficulty and hardship.” ― Father’s Day proclamation , 2012

On A Father’s Duty
“Every father bears a fundamental obligation to do right by their children.” ― Father’s Day proclamation, 2012

On Precious Moments
“In the end, that’s what being a parent is all about — those precious moments with our children that fill us with pride and excitement for their future, the chances we have to set an example or offer a piece of advice, the opportunities to just be there and show them that we love them.” ― Father’s Day address, 2011

On Unconditional Love
“Above all, children need our unconditional love — whether they succeed or make mistakes; when life is easy and when life is tough.” ― Father’s Day address , 2011

 

1) Anant Rangacharya N.S., Principle Upanishads, Bengaluru, India.

2) Srinivasan N.R., Father’s Day Worship in American Churches and Hindu Temples.

   Hindu Reflections <nrsrini.blogspot.com>

3) Ronnie Mcbrayer, Thanks Dad for Wising Up, Nashville Christian Family, June 2014.

4) Swami Vireswarananda, Srimad Bhagavad-gita, Ramakrishna Math, Chennai, India.

5) Jim Edward, It is important to show appreciation to Fathers, The Tennessean,  June  2014.



[This discourse material is a compilation from the reference above    as well as other sources for a prepared lecture for delivering at Vedanta Class of Sri Ganeha Temple which is gratefully acknowledged. I do not claim anything as original though I have included my explanations and comments elaborately suitably editing. Anybody is free to download partly or fully this discourse, modify and redistribute this as well as other  discourses from the blog Hindu Reflections <nrsrini.blogspot.com> for spreading the wisdom of Vedas and scriptures further.  These  lectures are  posted on the blog for the benefit of those who are not able to attend my lectures personally due to personal reasons or due to not living in Nashville or able to go through the various sources as I have done.]